Sheffield Writer, Music /TV reviewer, & Northern Opinion Pieces

Showing posts with label 2025. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2025. Show all posts

Sunday, 18 May 2025

The Cocaine Diaries: A Venezuelan Prison Nightmare (Paperback) by Paul Keany with Jeff Farrell

 


If you have a good sense of humour and a few hours to kill, the narration alone makes this audiobook enjoyable. Quite frankly, it's that bad, it becomes funny. Written by Irish plumber come drug mule, Paul Keany, you’d expect the writing to be a little ropey, yet this was written with the help of an actual journalist, so Im unsure why it is this bad - but that's not the only thing bad about this book.  At the start, I thought ‘If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime’, which sounds unsympathetic, but Paul's character does little to enable the reader to sympathise or understand this nightmare predicament. 

The book starts with Paul's trip to Venezuela, explaining that he lost his plumbing business in the recession, which sounds dreadful, but I can't understand how you'd think becoming a drug mule (knowingly) would ease the issue, or that you'd get away with it? idiot. Paul mentions recreational cocaine use as part of his weekend lifestyle choices, so I expect he knew dealers already.  

Having failed to smuggle a suitcase with 6 kilos of cocaine out of Venezuela, and being busted at the airport, our hero (he really thinks he is) smuggles cocaine INTO the Venezuelan jail, Los Teques,  so he can deal for prison cash. He also brews illicit alcohol, gets into fights, snorts cocaine daily (his words) and befriends a band of fellow criminals, which at times, makes this nightmare prison sound like a holiday camp (this is where the audiobook narration becomes laugh out loud funny). 

Throughout this book, Paul Keany talks about morality, choices and karma, and having based this book on his prison diaries, his real-life ending is karma all on its own. Paul Keany died of a cocaine and alcohol induced heart attack in 2021 at age 58, which is karma in its purest form, I'd guess, quite like that cocaine he tried to smuggle into Ireland. No sympathy whatsoever. 

If you want a good drug mule, true crime story (with a hint of the Irish), I'd suggest 'You'll never see daylight again' by Michaela McCollum. instead.

www.ryanoxleywriter.blogspot.com 


Sunday, 9 February 2025

Morrissey's Autobiography : After 12 years, Is It Time For A Sequel?

 


When Autobiography was published in 2013 as a Penguin Classics edition—a distinction usually reserved for long-dead literary greats—it sparked immediate debate. Was it an act of self-indulgence or a well-earned nod to Morrissey's undisputable cultural impact? I remember first reading this sat on a Sheffield tram in the cold winter of that year. Twelve years have passed yet this book has never left my bookcase. During the Winter of 2024, while the rest of the world ate turkey and tinsel, I revisited the book to write a review. Another two months have passed, so here it is. My idol is Morrissey, and I also read like an obsessive librarian, so I thought I'd combine the two and try (once again) to write a book blog. Let me know what you think in the comments box!




There's More To Life Than Books You Know!


From the outset, Autobiography reads unlike any standard memoir. Morrissey’s writing style is as florid and grandiose as his lyrics, overflowing with poetic turns of phrase, obscure references, and sharp humour. His sentences stretch for paragraphs, and his storytelling often lacks conventional structure. It makes for a rich, if sometimes exhausting, reading experience. At times, his prose is breathtakingly beautiful; at others, it veers into self-parody (very similar to his solo work, I feel)






Manchester, you have a lot to answer for!


The book begins with an evocative account of his childhood in 1960s and 1970s Manchester, (think 'The Headmasters Ritual) a city he describes as grey, oppressive, and joyless - "the arse of the world" he once sang. His depictions of corporal punishment in Catholic school, and a violent neighbourhood, describe a generally stifling existence. Yet there is a dark romance in his descriptions, often like these lyrics, he finds beauty in the melancholy - a trait he certainly cashed in on in The Smiths and his solo career. As you can expect for someone who wears his cultural icons on his sleeve - Music and film serve as his escape routes, and he writes movingly about the impact of artists like the New York Dolls, and Patti Smith, and his early fascination with legendary playwright (and Morrissey Iconography image N0.1) Oscar Wilde.





The Smiths: I Won't Share You...


Naturally, Autobiography dedicates considerable space to The Smiths, the band that made Morrissey a household name. His descriptions of meeting Johnny Marr and their creative partnership are joyous at times and seem filled with a sense of destiny. In terms of music history, it's a 'When Lennon Met McCartney' moment. But Morrissey seems unable to celebrate The Smiths without simultaneously mourning their dissolution and cataloguing how he feels wronged. The legal battle over royalties, which saw drummer Mike Joyce successfully sue Morrissey and Marr, is recounted in excruciating detail. While his bitterness is understandable, his obsessive resentment towards Joyce and the legal system feels excessive, dragging down an otherwise exhilarating chapter of the book - 'I bear more grudges than lonely high-court judges' he once sang.




Morrissey Solo Career...


Morrissey’s solo career, which he sometimes frames as a battle for survival, is covered in a more fragmented way. He highlights the successes, like Viva Hate and You Are the Quarry, but also dwells on his struggles with the music industry, dismissive critics, and perceived betrayals. His clashes with record labels, the press, and former associates reinforce his image as a misunderstood, embattled figure. The insight into his songwriting process is rather inspiring.



It's Not Like Any Other Love...


One of the more surprising elements of this book is Morrissey’s candid discussion of his relationships, an aspect of his life he long kept private. He details significant romantic connections, particularly his relationship with photographer Jake Walters. This revelation complicates his long-maintained aura of celibacy and ambiguity, making it one of the book’s most intriguing aspects.



Autobiography is a book that, like its author, refuses to conform. It is brilliant in places, insufferable in others, but always compelling. Morrissey’s storytelling is evocative and often hilarious. For fans, the book is essential reading, offering deep insight into his psyche and creative world. Love him (like I do) or loathe him (like everybody else does) Autobiography ensures that his legacy—flawed, fascinating, and fiercely individual—will endure.







Twelve years after its publication Morrissey's solo career is still going strong. He's also just announced another USA tour.  I would love to see an update to his Autobiography, as Morrissey's career has been just as dramatic these past twelve years.,



My next Morrissey book to re-review is List Of The Lost


Words by @rybazoxo


www.ryanoxleywriter.blogspot.com 


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